I'm writing this only because my friend Anson had some issues with The Blog. About how I write only once in a blue moon. A post a month isn't bad. At least that's what I think. Do I actually have that many interested readers that they can't get enough? I hardly think so. Whenever I see my posts, I feel I've done a good job of maintaining continuity. Not continuity, what's the word I'm looking for ? Consistency ? No. Damn it.

Right now I have The Blog open on another tab and see that the posts per month have reduced. Errr.

WRITER'S BLOCK.


23 minutes of thought. Nothing yet.

47 minutes.

I'm done.

I'll be back soon.

=D

What would you like to read ?

Should I write for the sake of writing or should I write when I want to write.

Should I write when I have something to say or should I write when I can come up with something to say.

Should I write like how I started out this blog or should I just write about what I want to.

Should I write about things happening around me or should I write about things I wish was happening.

The weather.

The week that was.

The elegance of the NYC skyline.

The feel of walking through the West Village.

The awe of the Empire State Building.

The brilliance of Jazz.

The magic of movies.

The awesomeness of Veetle TV.

The cold of Fall.

The plans for Thanksgiving.

The feel of that morning coffee.

The mental image of that girl you saw.

Sounds good ? I could go on and on. But what's the point in that ? Just writing random stuff on one of billion things in my head. I hardly ever write for myself. Yes , the first few posts were made for venting frustration , anger and all that junk. Now , I don't feel like writing unless I feel the need to share something important , funny , exciting or weird.

What would you like to read ?

A Little bit of Something

There are so many things we don't know. Things we didn't know existed. There is so much to know out there that I believe it's not possible to know everything. Or even half of everything. Even if one learns a 100 new things each day of his/her adult life, can he/she know it all ? Not even close. We live in an age where everyday something new pops up somewhere. Plus we have million plus years of "data" already found. That's a huge amount of "stuff". I guess the cavemen had it easy. History for them would have possibly been a page, or i guess (it being the stone-age), a slab. What I am getting at is there's so much out there in the world. Some interesting, some not that interesting at all.

This past week I came across something that caught my eye. I was browsing the Times of India website and ended up at the medals tally of the Commonwealth Games. It's not often that people look at countries at the bottom of the medals list. I did. And way down, having won 1 gold and 1 silver was Nauru. Both medals were for Weightlifting. But what crossed my mind was - What the hell is Nauru ?

It's obviously a country. Duh. And it's a commonwealth country. That's all I knew. Well, that doesn't count as anything as that's (too stupid to finish the sentence). I needed to know more. So, enter Google. Search - Nauru. Without even waiting for the entire page to load, I click on maps. I zoom out to see the world map to see where it lies. I lose it. Not my mind, but Nauru. I search for it again. This highly magnified image opens that shows this almost circular piece of land. I say piece of land because it's absolutely tiny. Too tiny to be an island ? I zoom out. Slowly this time. And realize that it's this tiny "thing" in the middle of the vast Pacific Ocean. Tiny meaning minuscule. It's near Papua New Guinea. Zoom in again to check it out. Ask Pushkar and Vinay about it. We laugh looking at its size. I mean, come on. Its absolutely so small. It seems to have one main road around it's circumference. A lone airstrip whose end seems to be built over water. Switch to satellite imaging. It seems like it's just forests with a ring of civilization on its circumference. And a location says - Republic of Nauru Phosphate. Laughter breaks out again. This tiny island (well, it is surrounded by water on all sides) had us engrossed. Sometime later, I ask Steve - Hey, Have you ever heard of a country called Nauru. I was ready to impart knowledge to someone. Be the big man. His reply - YES.

My jaw dropped. I was at a loss for words. And he laughs. We run through the same process of Googling (when did google become a verb) it. And he tells me he knows of it because they once spoke about it on "This American Life", a show on NPR (i think). That was absolutely fascinating. This made us read the entire Wikipedia article about it. It's really cool. Something that I bet a lot of you haven't heard of.

It's nice to discover these facts and read about them. It teaches you something and your not losing anything by reading about it. But do definitely check out Nauru if you can. You will not be disappointed.

This American Life link : http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/253/the-middle-of-nowhere

That's all for now.

P.S : Did you know there is a piece of France above the USA ? Check it out.

:D

What do You Watch ?

Everyone watches stuff. And by stuff i mean, TV shows , movies , documentaries , miniseries(s?). I watch a lot. Of everything. And how do I decide what to watch, what is good ? Good Ol' www.imdb.com .

Yes, IMDB ratings are pretty good. Accurate. I mean, The Shawshank Redemption has a 9.1 and Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 has a 1.4. Yes , i have actually seen Superbabies 2. Gives you an idea on how many movies I watch. Sometimes though you just have to watch the movie first and then decide whether you like it on not. I mean, IMDB ratings are by people just like us. You and me had an effect on how the rating comes out.

Even if it was a movie I really wanted to watch, IMDB came first. And what defines a "good" movie. A rating of 6.0 and over. Or is it 7.5 and over. Personally, my cut off was a 7.0. How many movies are you missing just because it has a ratings of 5.6. Does everyone else know our taste better than ourselves. No, in every way, they don't.

For the past few weeks, I've been watching movies without checking IMDB. It was tough at first but then it became a lot easier. I saw movies that I would never have even thought of watching only because of IMDB. I opened up a whole new experience of movies.

Sometimes though , the movie I watch might actually end up being brilliant and have a 7.2 on IMDB. Others haven't been as lucky. I wouldn't have watched quite a few movies that had me engrossed for those 90-130 minutes.

Nothing or noone is as good a judge of anything as we are. Not IMDB. Not any critic. Not anyone. If you think it'll be a good watch, watch it. Judge for yourself. There's nothing as good as that.

Why I support the teams I support

I watch a lot of sports. I support teams that play those sports. Why do I support the teams I support - Here's why.

Liverpool F.C. - I got into football only once I started to play it. This was back in December 2004. I had played a few times before, seen a few games. Nothing really caught my attention. It was only in the end of 2004 did I really get into it. Playing every weekend with Vyaas, Avi and the rest of the good ol' footy gang lit a fire in me. I started to love this game! And I started to watch it too. The English Premier League. What everyone was watching. And who did everyone support - Manchester United. I have to admit that I never liked them. Something about the team didn't make me happy. Probably because they were the best team at the time. They dominated the 90's and seemed like the first decade of this century would be their's too. So Manchester was out. Arsenal was a team I knew about. Thanks to the many Arsenal memorabilia in Tarun's house. But, something drew me to Liverpool. They aren't the best. They don't play the most beautifully. They were having a lousy season ( though not as bad as last year). Yet, after watching a couple of games, I was in love. I knew the Reds were going to be my team. And they have been ever since. I am thrilled when they win. Depressed when they lose. Excited when they sign someone new. Disappointed when they don't sign people good enough. I know, This is my team. Always. Forever. You'll never walk alone.

Chennai Super Kings - It's really hard to grow up in India and not be a fan of cricket. Cricket has been an international game since it was thought of. India vs. Australia. England vs. New Zealand. It's always been countries. Until the IPL came along. The idea of a cricket league on the lines of the football leagues in Europe was a brilliant idea (to me). A way to mix the best Indian talent with a few foriegn greats battling each other for the pride of a city a lot of the players probably don't call home. Sounds weird. Though something along the same lines was created in the ICL, it being unofficial didn't really excite anyone. When the IPL was announced, people knew this was going to be big. And obviously, Chennai got a team. It's home team. The Chennai Super Kings. The Men in Yellow. Then came the auction which was followed by M.S.Dhoni , Matthew Hayden, Muttiah Muralitharan , Makhaya Ntini and a lot more. The fever started. Watching every game, at home or with friends. Going to a few games. This was it. This was my team.

Los Angeles Lakers - I have always loved basketball. Playing every Sunday at 4 at school with the guys is something I really miss. And I think I've been watching it for even longer. I think my first memories of watching basketball was when Jordan won that 5th title with the Bulls. That was probably the only team I knew then. I remember (vaguely) watching the Finals with Karthik Anna. Then came a lull. I didn't really follow the game as much as I would have liked too. I watched random games here and there. The Nets vs. The Lakers. Allen Iverson in the NBA Finals. Then I watched the 2006 finals between the San Antonio Spurs and the Cleveland Cavaliers. When LeBron lost 0-4. Then one of my all time favorites moved to the Celtics. I wanted to see Kevin Garnett with a Championship. Did that make me a Celtics fan? Not really. Because I wanted Dirk Nowitzki to win one too. And Steve Nash. And Jason Kidd. Then the Lakers won. I kinda never liked the Lakers. No particular reason or such. I knew they were a great team. Then fast forward to the NBA Finals 2010. Sid invites me to Game 1. I go. The Forum changed it all. I was hooked. It was the entire setting. The game. The place. The crowd. Being drunk helped too I guess. I loved it. I wanted to be a Laker fan. All my previous notions were out of the window. I wanted this. I wanted this to be my team.

Pittsburgh Steelers - This could be more because of family than anything else. Though I have to admit that the first NFL game I ever saw was the Steelers vs. the Seahawks. Superbowl something. Ashwin Anna was at home and we watched the game together. It's very possible that I wouldn't know anything about the game if it wasn't for him. Who knows anything about the NFL outside this continent anyway. I guess it made things easier for me about whom to support. I like the Steelers now. They are the team I support.




I love these teams !!!

GO LIVERPOOL.

GO CHENNAI.

GO LAKESHOW.

GO STEELERS.

My Teams.

Year One - III

I realized I wasn't here to play the fool and have fun. I was here for a reason. I can't afford to play the fool, have fun all the time. Thought I made a mistake. A big one. I guess that's what it took for me to get serious and realize why I came to the USA. A bad grade.

Christmas at Pittsburgh. Going to a Penguins game. Back in NYC. Picking up Vyaas at Penn Station. Meeting up with Vishoka, Vishwam and his friends. Meeting random people and going out. Ball drop at Times Square. Poker back home. An interesting new years. Ethiopian food. Going out with Anusha and Danny in NYC. Headed to Summit for a week of rest. Back in NYC for Sid's birthday. Accepting what has happened. My birthday. Narayan's sugar "cake". Semester starts. Realise I have to prove myself to myself. Courses. Projects. Inter-mural Soccer. Soccer at Tillary Street. Playing pranks on Kanishka. New roommate. First actual party at home. Vivek's birthday. Narayan leaves to California. Mid Terms. Going to Harry-O's after the last one. Knocking down beers with Pushkar. Counterstrike craziness. Party at Vinay's house. Helping Sid move to hoboken. S'Mac. Back to school. Term paper. 2nd Mid Term. Finals. And semester 2 is done. Good grades. The smile is back !

SUMMER!

A slow start. Heading to Rochester. Hanging out with Rohin, MSK and Surya. Adi comes. Sanjay comes. Seneca Lake. Random places. PEARL :D. Roadtrip somewhere. Six Flags Darien Lake. Driving through Pennsylvania. Rafting in the Youghiogheny River. Real rapids. Falling in the water. Losing my new sunglasses. Driving back. A stop at a motel near Erie. Drunk and calls to Mickey and Vipul. Niagara Falls. Sanjay leaves in Buffalo. Back in Rochester. Adi leaves. Back to NYC. Back to research. Don and me trying to figure out the nozzle. New project. A month of work. The NBA Finals. The Forum. Black and Tan's for dinner. Getting hammered every alternate day. Dim Sum. World Cup. Don and me streaming on ESPN3 at office. Leave to Colorado. Family reunion. Meeting Yadav after 16 years. A week of fun. Amazing fun. Back to NYC. Scary realisation of what might happen. Start Blog. It all works out. All's good. Work continues. Ads arrives. A week as an NYC tourist. Weekend at Summit. Back to school. Back to work. Doing random shit. Hanging out with Sid. Rohin drops in. Wii at home. Summer's gone by so fast.

And School starts tomorrow. Semester 3.

Year One - II

I actually have to go back to the previous post to see where I left off.

All this was overwhelming. Thinking back, it all seems like a dream. So much has happened that it's difficult to mention it all. Forgot to mention stuff too. Funny the way you forget somethings and when you do remember it, it gets stuck and you'll never forget that "thing" again.

Our first birthday celebration at home. The first time friends came over and we sat around drinking. Taking the Ya-Ya's out for dinner. For all they've done for me. It doesn't even come close to paying them back. Talking to dad over Skype. Talking to mom in Nebraska (Still feel bad I couldn't go see her). Going to go to Boston for Vihaan's First Birthday. The first time my friends and I went to Harry-O's and made Kanishka pay. Growing the goatee and mustache. Shaving off the goatee and mustache(Why!). Going ice skating. Spraining my ankle. Limping to pick up the dudes from Rochester. Having an insane party at home with them. Thanksgiving at Ashwin Anna's. Heading to Summit for the rest of the break. Back at NYC. Freaking out that the semester's ending and finals are up. Still playing the fool. Finding allposters.com. Studying in the library. My first final in the US.The first snow! A storm. Heading out from library to home playing in the snow. Making crazy stuff in the snow outside on the pavement. Putting up the posters. Finishing my last final of the first semester. The party at home. The pictures say it all.

One semester done. 5 months in the USA. It was all fun till then. Then reality HIT.

Year One.

(The name doesn't refer to the movie,but yes, took the name from there. Seemed apt.)

One year in the Big Apple. One year in one of the world's largest cities. One year in the most populated city in the United States. It's definitely been an interesting year. Learnt so much. About myself. About a lot of things. New York City has been such a change and I love this city.

A year ago, when I left home for the first time , it was an adventure to look forward too. My first trip abroad. The start of a new chapter. A Masters Degree. Taking away unimaginable memories from 21 and a half years in the same city. Where I grew up. Where I spent my childhood. Where I had my first kiss. Where I had my first break-up. The city where I learnt everything about life. Till I left. I was looking forward to this new beginning. Being away from home for the first time. Meeting new people. Living on my own. Having family around the city was definitely helpful. Helped my get my bearings and not being overwhelmed by the fact that I was in a new country. A new world.

I remember landing and my sheer excitement of being here. Where I've always wanted to be. Not NYC , but the US. Driving back to Daya Anna's house, looking outside like a 5 year old. Learning to cook for the first time. And actual food. Not the omelette like i did back home. It was incredible. And it only got better. I remember the first time I stepped out in the city. Yes, I was lost :) . I remember looking all the way up at the skyscrapers at 34th street. The feeling I got when I saw NYU Poly for the first time. Signing up for classes. Playing the basketball game at the Orientation. I was thrilled. Then Daya Anna left for my house(irony) and I was left to fend for myself for the first time in 21 years. Managed to survive without bringing the house down. Found my first apartment. Met my roommates. This was my new world.


Then finally, September 8th. The day after labor day. Moved into my apartment. My room. The freedom was insane :D. Then classes started. Work started. Research work. When I tell friends back home, they laugh. What is research work in India. Made so many more friends. Hung out with my roommates. Went to Times Square. TGIF. Brooklyn Park. It was a dream. Living on my own.

Going to continue this later.

Things I have missed this past year.

1. Mom's cooking.
2. Mom's chocolate cake.
3. Nagamma's dosas in the morning.
4. R.K. Pan House.
5. Meeting up for footy with the brood.
6. Meeting Mickey at Pandey
7. Meeting Vipul all over.
8. Lemon Tea at Taj.
9. Basketball every Sunday at School.
10. Roaming around Annanagar with Daga.
11. Sitting on Sharan's terrace.
12. Playing KPL at Raju's house with the boys.
13. Doing nothing at Abhinay's house.
14. Ashok Pan House.
15. Free messaging.
16. TV.
17. Beating Daga at Fooseball.
18. Juice at Niagara with the football gang.
19. Riding my Bike.
20. PS3 at Tarun's place.
21. Trips to College.
22. Bhai Shop with Adi , Vinoth, Vipul, Anuj, Dope.
23. The Beach.
24. Talking to Dad about office.
25. Going to Quality with Abhinay.
26. The frequent Paramount visits.
27. Meeting up with the cousins, whenever and wherever.
28. Meeting Vinoth and Goofy at Hyderabad Biryani.
29. Laughing about the excuses of Vignesh with Sharan , Raju and Abhinay.
30. The "Study" sessions at Raju's house with God and Bubu.
31. Taking photocopies of Raju's notes every semester.
32. The extremely tiring and difficult task of going shopping with Vipul.
33. The extremely tiring and difficult task of going shopping with Daga.
34. Sharan asking Abhinay to take him to Birla Planetorium.
35. Meeting up with Shrawan after each and every semester exam at Bhai shop, ve used to be the first ones who finished the paper.
36. Me and Vipul screaming NOW! NOW! in the college bus.
37. Going to the gym with Emperor, King and Queen.
38. Going jogging with Raju and Pramodh.
39. Going to Nawabs with Daga almost daily.
40. Driving around with Abhinay in Frodo ( R.I.P )
41. BIRYANI
42. Terrace Visits at Abhinay's house and Mickey's house.

Is there depression in the air ? Lately , I've noticed a few statuses on networking sites that convey this. Somehow, a lot of people seem depressed or actually are. Is it something communicable ? I believe so. If someone around you is depressed and shows it, it'll spread. What you have to do is help that person through that time. And by depression I don't mean like really depressed. Just sadness that your life should be better than it is now.

In college, I remember Abhinay , Sarang and I had this stupid thing called "going-into-depression". At the time , we were the only ones who seemed to be doing it. And it used to be a funny thing. Telling each other we had dropped into "triple-D" and "penta-D". (I still think D-5 is a better name Were we just carefree and nothing really bothered us. Being at home, around people who we were always with for 3 years. Having the time of our lives. Nothing seemed like it could bring our spirits down. The "depression" was something we joked about. Sitting around doing nothing was classified as being in Depression.

I think as we grow older, we mature (duh, obviously). Life isn't supposed to be easy. An easy life is the equivalent of a dull boring movie. Tough times make us tougher individuals. We need to go through hardships to grow. To become who we are meant to be. Getting everything in life to go the way you want it to go just doesn't work. I mean , it'll be great if everything goes according to your plan. The world revolves around you. You want a change in the system, the change happens. No work, no stress. We need to be challenged. Challenges can bring you down. Hard. No doubt about it. Make you lose faith in yourself and everything around. True. And getting back hard is tougher still. But it is possible. To get up stronger. To overcome anything in our way.

This is how we grow. This is how we learn. There's nothing wrong with that, is there?

Feels Like An Alien ?

Today , my friend from College Sarang S Nair put up a status on Facebook " Sarang feels like an alien". It got me thinking. There have been times where I've thought I was an alien myself. Is it a good thing ? A bad thing ? Or something so absolutely cool that it should have been through ?

I think I went through this period (fairly short) when I thought I didn't belong anywhere. This was when the "Me being an Alien" idea came about. At this time I thought that I was from some faraway planet. That I was all alone and will always be alone. That was depressing. The fun part started like 5 minutes later when I thought I was probably like Kal-el (Superman). That I was meant for a greater cause. Sounds exciting.

Does everyone go through these "times of trouble" where you think you don't belong. Your a lost soul in a funny world. Is it a good thing ? To go into the deep, dark details of why you exist ? I think it's something everyone should go through. Not cause they need to know where they come from but just so that they realize they are here for a reason. I believe that each and every soul on the planet is here for a reason. And to realize that, really realize it ... this has to happen. maybe not for everyone. Maybe not for anyone too. I felt I needed that. It might have lasted only for an hour or two, but it helped. Like a right of passage. Something that had to happen for me to grow. As a person , as an individual.

A Time Machine

Been a while. Been occupied otherwise. One thing that has always , well , I can't say troubled but ... let me put it this way - One thing that I've always pondered about is whether if we had time machines , will you go back in time to change certain events or will you travel to the future to see how you've turned out. Good or Bad. A success or a failure. A Millionaire or pauper. I know everyone has thought about this at sometime in their lives. I'm sure of it.

How will I turn out ? Though what I'd really like to know if I do travel to the future is whether I am on the right path. Whether what I am doing right now is , well, right. Rather than see the riches I've earned or the millions I've lost , I would want to know whether I end up happy. Cos at the end of it all, isn't it what we all crave. Happiness. Being Happy. Dying a happy man. Though a trip to the future could also spell doom. If , and I really mean IF, you turn out to be a lost soul, alone , will you be able to handle it and accept that you've strayed from what could have been an awesome life and go back and change or will the disappointment be too hard to handle and you just lose your mind. I don't know how I'll take it. Guess it all depends on how the future is. Hopefully, Skynet won't take over. :)

Do we really want to know the future? Won't it be more exciting and scary to discover it ourselves. I might just want to wait and see how things go. Live my life now rather than see what's in store for me later. My views.

Now coming to past events. I feel each and every one of us has a moment in life where we would like to go back and change what occurred. I know I would like to change certain moments. For sure. To help me. Maybe a decision that hurt people or hurt me. But isn't it those events that help us grow. Help us learn. Help us come back stronger. I know I have learnt from many of such events. I hope everyone else has too.

Why is it that there's always a Plus side and a Minus side to everything. But that's just life isn't it. You always come to a fork in the road and decide which one to take. Each has it's own pros and cons. Life is all about making the right choice. Or working through the wrong one to make it right. Never give up. Keep with it and there will a reward at the end.

When everything fits !

Doesn't it feel so good when everything is alright ? Does it make you want to jump with joy ! When all is good again doesn't everything seem bright and pretty ! but where does the thanks go.

When anything and everything or probably even the smallest thing goes wrong, we always have someone or something to blame. You know that's true so don't try to deny it. But when somehow everything works out, where does the thanks go. Even if it was you who solved the problem, there had to be someone who also helped, in whatever way possible. Do you thank them?

It's very easy to blame someone about something. It's easy to complain. The difficult part is remembering to thank people. I know I have failed in this aspect umpteen number of times.

Coming back to the feeling you get when everything just fits. In life, at work, in school. It's an unbelievable feeling. When all that could go wrong, almost did. And in time everything works out. For the good. Better. You cherish those moments. Hope they continue. Because that is what life is about. Getting everything to work out. To fit. And right now, I know this feeling. I have this feeling.

And it's great.

Sooner than Expected

Didn't think I'd be posting so soon. Guess boredom got the better of me.

Why is life so complicated. There are a million decisions to be made before one and sit back and smile. What to do. When to do. Why to do. How to do. It sounds like all the question words were created just for this. Can anyone get through life without making any decisions. It might have been done. As, like we have all heard before, nothing is impossible.

Okay. So we make decisions. Good or bad, they are going to affect us and the people around us. How does one define a decision to be good or bad. What one might think is/was a bad decision could actually be something he/she was meant to do. Born to do. Which brings me to another point. Destiny.

Does everyone on this earth have a pre-written destiny. Are we all puppets in some grand plan that's already written for us? Don't we make choices for ourselves. This is actually something I've always thought about. Do we control our lives or does everything happen according to a script created for us ages before we existed. The easy way to look at it is that everything that happens is destiny. Bad things happen cause they are meant to. It's written in the cards. The cheap way to look at it is that if something good happens, it's all you and if something goes wrong, blame destiny.

People say that everything that happens, happens for a reason. All bad things lead to something good. But for how long can you keep repeating that in your head. Till your an adult. 30. 50. Or till the day you breathe your last and regret leaving everything to destiny.

Something to think about.

1

My first post. A way to express the inner thinkings of my mind. I never thought it would be so hard to put thoughts to paper, or a text editor. I guess we never realize how difficult that is.

This might be a blog just to vent my frustrations about the world and the minor/major events happening around me. It could also be a diary which, when I look back on 1-2 years or even 5-10 years on, see how much I've grown. I know there are people out there with worse problems and in worse situations than me. I know this might come off as being a little selfish. But I don't care. I need to get it out. And you might ask why I can't write a diary like in the old days. Well, I hope that I can get some valuable comments and advise about what I write.

My posts might not be too regular. This might be just a summer thing. Yet, I know that this can and will help me out. That this might just be the way I can stop thinking about stuff and move on.

"A Reflection" is what came to mind when I started to create this. It just means I am going to reflect on what I've seen, been through and thought about.

I know the name of the blog is deep. "It is who we are that defines us". Well, I think all my posts are going to be about the way I see the world and the way the world sees things.

It's a tough world out there and nothing comes easy. We strive to be the best we can.

Peace.

Atu